i fear if i ever escape myself, Stockholm syndrome will devour me. everywhere i go, i hit stop signs & collapse to the ground. "not this time.. maybe? no, perhaps next time." i've stopped my thoughts. cigarettes are bad for me. popsicles may just have saved my life and i never have the answers to anything worth having answers for.
i want to go to a play. sit down and watch people's passions come to life. stop wheezing and coughing like an invalid. survive off of notions and words and imagination. tomorrow we intervene Larisa's little situation. i haven't the ability to care what she does with herself now. those without self respect leave me without reason to respect. as long as my niece is out of harms way... that's when the tension builds. and then i remember what a sad, pathetic little bitch of a boy she has over there "fathering" gloria. it disgusts me. i kid you not, i just had the FLU & still the thought of him .....HIM ..ugh... makes me more nauseated than anything.
lets switch up the subject matter...
i just googled the correct spelling of "miscellaneous". MWUAH, google i love you!
& i fear it gets me a little down when i'm in such a chill, jolly mood.. NATURALLY & and i can't seem to cheer up those in need. frustrates me & i don't want to think about it anymore. i have problems too.. but now is one of those times i can put my worry on the back burner and just marinade in my contentment.
now, with my sad, wheezy lungs, time to give in to my masochistic urges... then sleep.

goodnight world.