hidden

it's like a knife in the back
like a punch in the gut
like a break in the heart
a being so purely special
so sweetly humble
too simply perfect
to be

its quite unfair
the bittersweet acceptation
unfortunate compliance
unwilling surrender
so fucking hard to admit
so god damn hard to say yes
if i could keep you forever
i'll do all i could
as it was

now this song
permanent audibles
signatures illegible
yes, he's cute. but you have no idea
as a child, lost
as an object, never
avoided in speech
avoided in thought
regret
pain
discomfort
never...
i will not forget
forever imprinted
welded in place
my favorite mistake
my sweetheart
my baby
my son
as it was

i kill myself
maybe it's silly
when i see your face

i had a chance to sit down and think about it and realized i really don't blog nearly as much as i used to. and i like to blog.. it's my fun little time-passing project that i really should get back into. god knows i take enough pictures to have a nice little thing going on here. better give them some purpose other than to just stagnate in my phone or on my online photo album. what other reason is there to take pictures if not to show them off, hmmm? so it begins. may the blogging commence...

my favorite road buddy

the baby likeses the rides in the cars :P

i have been in quite the mushy mood. twitterpated. in agony. desiring. aching.

i wonder when it will pass. i wonder if it is as strong as it feels. i wonder if it may be stronger still than i could know at the moment. i still wonder if it is one-sided. if maybe i'm taking it a little further than is really necessary. i don't want to be wrapped around a finger who's owner is not wrapped around mine. i don't care what level it is. i don't need intensity. i'm quite content either way. mutuality is all i seek.

i wonder how bad it must be that i struggle to sleep because i cannot get it off my mind. i can honestly say i've never experienced such a romance cliche.

i'll allow myself another shot to calm the rampant static electricity that this passion has become in my head. i'm glad i have this place to think. otherwise i'd have no outlet.



there's no one to talk to.